Let the weather outside be frightful –
join us for something delightful...
South Central Wisconsin BDSM Friends
presents:
the "Frosty Dinner"
Saturday, January 17th, 2009
Doors will open at 7:00 pm,
dinner will be served at 7:30,
with the event ending at 10:30
Admission: $15 per couple
At this dinner, submissives will serve their dominants.
This will be a formal dinner, though jackets are not
required. Please dress appropriately.
We apologize in advance that the location for
the Frosty Dinner is not handicapped accessible.
*To RSVP (or for more information),
contact kimaya (kimaya@orbisian.com)
by January 10th, 2009*
http://groups.google.com/group/southcentralwibdsmfriends
Tuesday, December 9, 2008
January Special Event!
Wednesday, October 15, 2008
More about "Erotic Slavehood"
I have finally worked my way through the book into the area that I feel many slaves will consider the fun part.;) This section is all about being a sex slave. In the very beginning she talks about how many slaves first discover their submissive tendencies in a sexual context. I agree with her and it started me thinking about how many folks ever move past that. I see many people on line especially who only want to submit in a sexual way. I'm not saying that is a good or bad thing, just wondering I guess.
In the next section she talks about sex workers as role models. This got me to thinking about my service and how in many ways it is like a profession. I'm always seeking to learn better ways of serving. I'm not sure that I'm really trying to learn new things sexually, so that landed in the things to do pile...lol. There was a great quote in this section that I just have to share...
"At it's best, sex work can become a spiritual calling, a vocation in the highest sense. Sex workers are healers and priestesses. They take a powerful experience - sex- and use it to move themselves and others into ecstacy and communication with the divine."
Next she moves into sex as psychology. She talks about how attitude is what makes a sex slave different than a lover. She focuses on serving vs self gratification, discretion, integrity, and honesty. From her she moves on to cover self care. I liked how she talked about getting enough rest for the body, mind and soul so that you can truely be the best slave possible.
She covers safer sex and talks about educating yourself. Personal care including: shaving, enemas and douches, controlling orgasm throught PC exercises and tantra, masturbation and erotic touch including how to get over shyness around stripping ect...
Next she covers clothing, restraint, and chastity devices, notes on corsetry, belts and cages. following this we move into anal plus, oral service, vaginal service including: Toys, Penis, fisting and g-spot stimulation. Lastly she covers anal sex.
Whew! Yeah that was alot of sex to cover...lol. Overall I liked what she had to say and as I've stated before I like her writting style. In this section of reading I really appreciated all of the safety advice she gave. Two thumbs up for me!
Erotic Slavehood by Christina Abernathy
kitten
In the next section she talks about sex workers as role models. This got me to thinking about my service and how in many ways it is like a profession. I'm always seeking to learn better ways of serving. I'm not sure that I'm really trying to learn new things sexually, so that landed in the things to do pile...lol. There was a great quote in this section that I just have to share...
"At it's best, sex work can become a spiritual calling, a vocation in the highest sense. Sex workers are healers and priestesses. They take a powerful experience - sex- and use it to move themselves and others into ecstacy and communication with the divine."
Next she moves into sex as psychology. She talks about how attitude is what makes a sex slave different than a lover. She focuses on serving vs self gratification, discretion, integrity, and honesty. From her she moves on to cover self care. I liked how she talked about getting enough rest for the body, mind and soul so that you can truely be the best slave possible.
She covers safer sex and talks about educating yourself. Personal care including: shaving, enemas and douches, controlling orgasm throught PC exercises and tantra, masturbation and erotic touch including how to get over shyness around stripping ect...
Next she covers clothing, restraint, and chastity devices, notes on corsetry, belts and cages. following this we move into anal plus, oral service, vaginal service including: Toys, Penis, fisting and g-spot stimulation. Lastly she covers anal sex.
Whew! Yeah that was alot of sex to cover...lol. Overall I liked what she had to say and as I've stated before I like her writting style. In this section of reading I really appreciated all of the safety advice she gave. Two thumbs up for me!
Erotic Slavehood by Christina Abernathy
kitten
Tuesday, October 7, 2008
More From "Erotic Slavehood"
This portion of the book was about Household Management. I thought it was written at a pretty simplistic level, but then again that is what some folks need. I found myself being really pleased that she put so much importance on this part of service. I feel that often slaves think that it is all about the sex and then are disappointed to learn that there is more to it then that. So she starts off talking about housework and cleaning. She outlines the reasons why a slave might want/need to know how to do these things.
Housework: first up is basic cleaning. She gives the submissive tips on how to get started.
Inventory all rooms
Go over each room asking yourself, "Is there anything I do not know how to clean?".
Break the jobs into small manageable tasks.
Gather your tools.
Complete each task before moving on.
Note any difficulties you encounter, brainstorm solutions.
Note how long each task takes.
Draw up a regular cleaning schedule.
Laundry: In this section she really just gives the basics of doing laundry.
Dishes: Again just the basics of hand washing and using a dishwasher.
Grocery Shopping: In this section she goes into great detail about how to formulate a list. She talks about never shopping hungry and meal planning.
Basic cooking: In this section she discusses basic cooking skill, simple meals, recipes and lastly how to make coffee and tea.
All of this info is really well laid out even if it seems rather elementary. No slave would have much of an excuse after reading this especially with all of the exercises and extra reading resources she provides.
Erotic Slavehood
Christina Abernathy
kitten
Housework: first up is basic cleaning. She gives the submissive tips on how to get started.
Inventory all rooms
Go over each room asking yourself, "Is there anything I do not know how to clean?".
Break the jobs into small manageable tasks.
Gather your tools.
Complete each task before moving on.
Note any difficulties you encounter, brainstorm solutions.
Note how long each task takes.
Draw up a regular cleaning schedule.
Laundry: In this section she really just gives the basics of doing laundry.
Dishes: Again just the basics of hand washing and using a dishwasher.
Grocery Shopping: In this section she goes into great detail about how to formulate a list. She talks about never shopping hungry and meal planning.
Basic cooking: In this section she discusses basic cooking skill, simple meals, recipes and lastly how to make coffee and tea.
All of this info is really well laid out even if it seems rather elementary. No slave would have much of an excuse after reading this especially with all of the exercises and extra reading resources she provides.
Erotic Slavehood
Christina Abernathy
kitten
Tuesday, September 30, 2008
Basic Training continued...
Well as you can see I've been doing more reading. :) Ms. Abernathy starts this chapter out asking the question, "What is obediance?". I really like how she discussed that obediance is more than just following rules. She went on to speak about the, "spirit of the law vs the letter of the law". I've seen many slaves/subs including myself be guilty of doing what they are told but not at all in the spirit it was intended. Loving care is not the same as I'm doing this but only cause your making me....lol.
The next topic covered was meditation. Now I use this in my spiritual practice and so this was nothing new to me. I've used meditation in so many ways throughout my adult life and I was happy to see it being offered here. She discusses it in the book as a way to become more aware of your inner thoughts, your surroundings and your body.
She also speaks briefly about physical states. Do you fidget ect...? Following this is a discussion about awareness of cues. What does sadness look like, or anger, or sleepiness?
The next portion of the book deals with journaling. I love to journal so I was happy to see this covered. She talks about how a slave should learn the discipline of writing in a slave journal everyday. The content doesn't matter so much as long as it is respectful. Along with this she covers voice training and forms of address.
Lastly she covers personal care and fitness. There is some brief discussion about how your appearance reflects on your Owner/Trainer. She talks about posture and things you can do to help you be more fit for the training process. From here she goes into voice commands and body positions.
I'm still really enjoying the reading. I find that most of this is info I know, but it is still a good reminder. I think this book could really be helpful to a new to the lifestyle slave or just someone who need some discipline in their life.
Erotic Slavehood
Christina Abernathy
kitten
The next topic covered was meditation. Now I use this in my spiritual practice and so this was nothing new to me. I've used meditation in so many ways throughout my adult life and I was happy to see it being offered here. She discusses it in the book as a way to become more aware of your inner thoughts, your surroundings and your body.
She also speaks briefly about physical states. Do you fidget ect...? Following this is a discussion about awareness of cues. What does sadness look like, or anger, or sleepiness?
The next portion of the book deals with journaling. I love to journal so I was happy to see this covered. She talks about how a slave should learn the discipline of writing in a slave journal everyday. The content doesn't matter so much as long as it is respectful. Along with this she covers voice training and forms of address.
Lastly she covers personal care and fitness. There is some brief discussion about how your appearance reflects on your Owner/Trainer. She talks about posture and things you can do to help you be more fit for the training process. From here she goes into voice commands and body positions.
I'm still really enjoying the reading. I find that most of this is info I know, but it is still a good reminder. I think this book could really be helpful to a new to the lifestyle slave or just someone who need some discipline in their life.
Erotic Slavehood
Christina Abernathy
kitten
Wednesday, September 24, 2008
More About "Erotic Slavehood"
I have moved on in my reading to the chapter called, "Training With Miss Abernathy, a workbook for erotic slaves and their owners." I really enjoyed this part of the book. She talks about the submissive/slave really considering their readiness to be involved with a Dominant/Owner. She encourages the reader to consider their likes and dislikes as well as their talents and shortcomings. Included in this is encouragement to study ways to achieve the things they desire in order to be a more well rounded person. There is also some discussion on contracts. I was cheering her on as she brought up how family, friends and community might respond to your lifestyle change. I often encounter subs/slaves who have the attitude that they really want to serve as long as it doesn't mess with their life to much ect.... In closing I'd like to include my favorite quote from this section: "No matter how technicaly correct the execution of a task may be, without the inner sense of earnest dedication a submissive brings to the work, the result is worthless."
Erotic Slavehood
by: Christina Abernathy
kitten
Erotic Slavehood
by: Christina Abernathy
kitten
Monday, September 22, 2008
More Erotic Slavehood
Last night I finished up part two and I really enjoyed it. It has been refreshing for me to read a book about Master/slave relationships since so many of the books seem aimed at play and nothing more. The first two subjects she covers in this next chapter are: How to find a submissive, and what to look for in a submissive. The basic qualities she lists are as follows:
Sincere
Loyal
Discreet
Clean
Modest
Graceful
Intelligent
Respectful
Observant
and Ethical
I was very happy to see "Intelligent" on that list. Often I see Obedient and not intelligent. That being said I think obedience is very important. Next she covered the qualities of a Dominant. They are as follows:
Personal Integrity
A clear sense of needs and limitations
A clear communicator
Good personal boundaries
Inquisitive
Creative
Versatile
Decisive
Intimate knowledge of the task that She/He sets forth for the submissive.
That last one is really important in my mind. There have been MANY times as a submissive when I have been asked to do something and then had it really not work out the way the Dominant intended it to. Often I feel this is because they really did not think it through. How hard is this task, does she have enough time to complete it, is she physically able?
The rest of Part 2 was dedicated to Commitment resources, Styles of dominance, Foundations of submissive ethics, Support for submissives, Taxonomy of slavehood, Types of D/s arrangements, D/s relationships, Contracts, Ending an association and the importance of prenuptials.
She really covers alot of ground in this second part. I can tell that she actually knows the lifestyle because she has lived it. So often when reading online I see people writing and it is so unrealistic. You get a sense that the only D/s lifestyle they have experience has all occurred at the keyboard. I cannot wait to see what is coming next!
The book is:
Erotic Slavehood
Author: Christina Abernathy
kitten
Sincere
Loyal
Discreet
Clean
Modest
Graceful
Intelligent
Respectful
Observant
and Ethical
I was very happy to see "Intelligent" on that list. Often I see Obedient and not intelligent. That being said I think obedience is very important. Next she covered the qualities of a Dominant. They are as follows:
Personal Integrity
A clear sense of needs and limitations
A clear communicator
Good personal boundaries
Inquisitive
Creative
Versatile
Decisive
Intimate knowledge of the task that She/He sets forth for the submissive.
That last one is really important in my mind. There have been MANY times as a submissive when I have been asked to do something and then had it really not work out the way the Dominant intended it to. Often I feel this is because they really did not think it through. How hard is this task, does she have enough time to complete it, is she physically able?
The rest of Part 2 was dedicated to Commitment resources, Styles of dominance, Foundations of submissive ethics, Support for submissives, Taxonomy of slavehood, Types of D/s arrangements, D/s relationships, Contracts, Ending an association and the importance of prenuptials.
She really covers alot of ground in this second part. I can tell that she actually knows the lifestyle because she has lived it. So often when reading online I see people writing and it is so unrealistic. You get a sense that the only D/s lifestyle they have experience has all occurred at the keyboard. I cannot wait to see what is coming next!
The book is:
Erotic Slavehood
Author: Christina Abernathy
kitten
Friday, September 19, 2008
A new book review.
I'm going to be reviewing a new book in segments, as I read it. I'm currently reading "Erotic Slavehood" by Christina Abernathy. I really enjoyed the Forward by Laura Antoniou. I have read her bdsm novels and really enjoyed them. What I liked about her Forward was how she admitted that all those wonderful bdsm novels are just that novels. It would be damn near impossible to actually live many of these fantasies.
In her introduction she talks about "What is bdsm?", "What bdsm is not", and "How D/s is different?". I really like her candidness as well as her practicality.
In part 1 (chapter 1) she covers "The Training Program". I really thought the info about interviewing a submissive was really well written. It highlighted the importance of knowing your submissive beyond just her/his erotic likes and dislike, limits ect...She speaks to knowing medical limitations as well as what medications the submissive is currently using. She also includes having a list of emergency contacts and knowing what info is safe to divulge to these contacts. And finally limitations of play that includes past abuse and incest history.
The ideas that kept coming up in my mind as I read through this part of the book are as follows: A Master/Mistress really needs to be consistant. It is important to the slave/submissive to know what expectations are in order to fulfill them. It is also a sign of committment in the eyes of the submissive if the Master/Mistress/Dom is being consistant. If the submissive slips up and the Dominant does not notice it can really be crushing to the submissive. I hav experienced this myself and know the pain it can cause. On the other hand, noticing the well done work of a submissive is also important. Praise and rewards show that the Dom is please which fills the submissives heart with joy and a sense of security.
Part 1 had much more content then I can communicate in one post. I can say that so far I'm really enjoying the book and I'm looking forward to reading the next installment.
kitten
In her introduction she talks about "What is bdsm?", "What bdsm is not", and "How D/s is different?". I really like her candidness as well as her practicality.
In part 1 (chapter 1) she covers "The Training Program". I really thought the info about interviewing a submissive was really well written. It highlighted the importance of knowing your submissive beyond just her/his erotic likes and dislike, limits ect...She speaks to knowing medical limitations as well as what medications the submissive is currently using. She also includes having a list of emergency contacts and knowing what info is safe to divulge to these contacts. And finally limitations of play that includes past abuse and incest history.
The ideas that kept coming up in my mind as I read through this part of the book are as follows: A Master/Mistress really needs to be consistant. It is important to the slave/submissive to know what expectations are in order to fulfill them. It is also a sign of committment in the eyes of the submissive if the Master/Mistress/Dom is being consistant. If the submissive slips up and the Dominant does not notice it can really be crushing to the submissive. I hav experienced this myself and know the pain it can cause. On the other hand, noticing the well done work of a submissive is also important. Praise and rewards show that the Dom is please which fills the submissives heart with joy and a sense of security.
Part 1 had much more content then I can communicate in one post. I can say that so far I'm really enjoying the book and I'm looking forward to reading the next installment.
kitten
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